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Creo Returns to Printing Industry with New Plate and Storage Technologies

Wednesday, April 01, 2015

Press release from the issuing company

WhatTheyDONTThink editors were pleased to find that Creo is back in the graphic arts industry. “It came as a complete surprise to us because we thought Kodak bought them years ago,” said Loren Ipswich, editorial director. The company is making plates and storage technologies, and has an intensive distribution policy. “We loved Creo. They had the best PR events, the best dinners, and some of the most interesting executives.” It seems that Jeremiah Gabrielson is no longer the CEO in the current incarnation of the company. “We'll miss his explanations about how lackluster financial performance and write-offs would not prevent analysts from overvaluing the company.” Ipswich said that the prior executive team claimed to be supportive of the industry then mysteriously disappeared once extra commas started appearing in their bank accounts. “The new Creo seems to have a better solution, especially in handling leftovers.”

http://www.creokitchen.com

Editor’s Note: This news item is part of WhatTheyThink's 2015 April Fools Edition.

 

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