In the wake of the recent Federal Communication Commission’s (FCC) decision regarding so-called “net neutrality,” the Council on Neutrality was recently formed to develop standards for neutrality. 

Part of the organization’s mandate in the struggle for net neutrality will be to testify before Congress and argue both sides of the issue, taking no stand wherever necessary. “We have no strong opinions on the matter whatsoever,” said Howard Blandman, President of the Council on Neutrality. 

Does Blandman feel that a threat to net neutrality is a threat to the future of the Internet itself? 

“I believe with every fiber of my existence that it is or is not possible,” he said. 

The Council of Neutrality has also been busy developing a comprehensive set of standards for neutrality, a 2,000-page document called the “Beige Book.” 

“The Beige Book standards may not may not completely codify what we believe are or are not best practices for net neutrality,” said Blandman.

Is Blandman and the Council willing to fight for what they may or may not believe in? “Give me liberty or give me death,” he said. “Either is fine. I have no strong feelings either way.”

Editor’s Note: This news item is part of WhatTheyThink's 2015 April Fools Edition.